Proverbs 26:17

Meddling with Strife

1. In this chapter so far, Solomon has described the fool (vs. 1-12), the sluggard (vs. 13-16), and now in vs. 17-28 Solomon writes about several other subjects dealing with bad behavior: arguing, deception, gossip, and lying.

2. Verse 17 speaks about the one who sticks his nose into strife—and the consequences of it.

17a He that passeth by, and meddleth with strife belonging not to him…

Meddling with strife belonging not to him…

1. Strife: Contention; quarreling; dispute; open hostility; conflict.

a. The term can also be used in a legal dispute or a physical altercation.

b. In our proverb, Solomon is using in the sense of an argument or dispute among everyday people in everyday scenarios.

c. Strife is everywhere.
• There is strife in the office, in the home, in the school, in neighborhoods, in the church, in the workplace, in politics, among nations, etc. Wherever there are people, (fallen human beings) there will be strife.
• It cannot be avoided entirely; therefore, it is a good idea to learn HOW to deal with strife when confronted with it—and you will be confronted with it!

d. This proverb tells us something to avoid when you come upon strife already in progress.

2. “Strife belonging not to him…”

a. This is a particular KIND of strife.

b. Solomon speaks about a man who is “passing by.”
• He just happens to be passing by. He isn’t out looking for trouble. He is not seeking to get involved in an argument.
• He is going about his daily business when he happens to come across others who are arguing.
• This is an argument that has nothing to do with the passer-by.

c. This is strife between or among two or more people—other than the passer by.

d. A person might stumble across people arguing almost anywhere: at the supermarket; at a ball field; at the mall; in the office; at a political rally; at school; in a restaurant; yes, even in church!

e. This is the scenario Solomon envisions in this proverb.

f. No doubt YOU and I have stumbled across this very scene—perhaps multiple times.

g. What should we do?
• There is a show on TV called “What would you do?” in which they set up a fake scene on the streets where someone is being verbally abused.
• In this show, they make heroes out of the people who intervene… who stick their noses into the situation, take sides, and try to defend the one they feel is being abused verbally.
• Obviously, there may be situations that require intervention.
• But this proverb warns us against sticking our noses into other people’s arguments that have nothing to do with us.

3. “Meddling” in someone else’s business—or dispute.

a. The expression translated “He that passeth by and meddleth” is actually one Hebrew word.

b. It speaks about a man who passes by an argument and implies that he sticks his nose in the middle of it (what we call meddling).

c. The Hebrew words means to pass by or to cross over. It is often used in a literal sense of crossing over a line, but is also used figuratively of crossing over a line of propriety. That is the sense in which it is used here.

d. In this proverb, Solomon speaks of a man who not only passes by… but crosses over a line. He oversteps his rightful place.

e. He does so by “meddling” into the affairs of others.

4. Is it a good idea to meddle into the disputes of others? Solomon thinks not.

a. Prov. 20:3 – It is an honour for a man to cease from strife: but every fool will be meddling.
• Honorable men avoid strife; fools meddle.
• Cease: Inactivity or a refusal to become involved in something, a holding back.
• There are times when an honorable man will refuse to become involved in strife. That is wisdom.

b. Prov. 18:6 – The lips of a fool enter into contention. (Therefore, stay out of contention—especially if it has nothing to do with you!)

c. Prov. 25:8 – “Go not forth hastily to strive, lest thou know not what to do in the end thereof, when thy neighbour hath put thee to shame.”
• Don’t be so quick to jump into strife.
• Why? Because once you jump into the fray, you may not be able to jump out so easily.
• You may bring shame upon yourself.
• Why? Because when you jump into someone else’s argument that has nothing to do with you, you don’t know all the facts. You might be assuming things that are not true. Thus, you might be jumping in on the wrong side and be embarrassed in the end.
• In this proverb (25:8) we are told not to go forth hastily into our own disputes. How much less should we haste to get involved in other people’s disputes!

d. II Tim. 2:24 – The servant of the Lord must not strive.
• Of course, we are in a battle for the truth. We are to strive for the truth.
• But in interpersonal problems, and in differences of opinions in earthly things, we are to avoid strife.
• In fact, we are to be peacemakers… not troublemakers.

17b Is like one that taketh a dog by the ears.

1. Consider the analogy here:

a. A man who happens to come across others arguing is like a man who comes upon a stray dog. (Dogs were not usually family pets in those days; they were more like scavenger animals.)

b. The man who sticks his nose into the disputes of others is like a man who grabs a dog by his ears.

c. If you pick up a dog by his ears you are most likely going to be bitten. Dogs don’t normally like to be picked up by their ears.

d. And once you grab an angry dog by his ears, you are in trouble.
• Holding him endangers you. He could turn his head and bite.
• Letting him go endangers you too. He is likely to bite you as soon as you let go.
• You can’t win in a situation like that.

2. The point is that people don’t like others sticking their noses into their business—even if the passer by MEANS well, it does not END well.

a. You might have both parties turn on you. If you try to break up a dog fight, BOTH dogs are likely to turn on you.

b. If two dogs are fighting with each other, and you think you will intervene (meddle) and end the fight by grabbing one of the dogs by his ears, you will be sorry.

c. The dog will not thank you for rescuing him. He will bite you for interfering in a dispute that had nothing to do with you.

d. Over the years I have received a good number of phone calls from well-meaning believers from other assemblies who have tried to draw me into a dispute among believers in their church and to take sides.

e. I stay away from such disputes that have nothing to do with me. I like to think of this proverb. It’s like grabbing a dog by the ears. No thank you!

3. I can’t read this proverb without thinking of President Lyndon Johnson, who infamously picked up his beagles by their ears to show them off. (That was in the days before PETA.)

a. Solomon uses this illustration to teach us a lesson in dealing with controversy and strife among men… human beings. (We humans behave somewhat like dogs!)

b. Sometimes the best way to deal with strife and controversy of others is to STAY OUT!

c. Don’t stick your nose into someone else’s business.

d. Even if you mean well, and intend to help, the parties involved may interpret your “help” as “meddling” and they may BITE you for interfering.

e. Jumping into the heat of someone else’s argument is not a good idea.

f. I Peter 4:16 – makes a clear distinction between “suffering as a busybody in other men’s matters” and “suffering as a Christian.”

g. If others are disputing and arguing about things that are none of our business, but we are aware of the dispute, the best thing we can do is to take it to the Lord in prayer.

h. Be ready with words of wisdom when asked.

i. A word spoken “in due season, how good it is!”